I woke up this morning convinced that I shouldn't go to school today. But after the long and treacherous battle in my head, logic held out and won. So here I am am, 8:58 am, in the library, already done with one class for the day. My 10 o'clock class got cancelled so I decided to use that time to come to the library, a rare occurrence. I don't know why but the library seriously gives me anxiety or something. I can't concentrate here. So much to look at and so many people to watch. Why can't I be dedicated like the 15 people around me and actually do something productive for once? The only people that are in the library at 9:01am are the ones that are seriously dedicated to school. Then there's little me just blogging. Oh goodness. I decided like a month ago that I was going to forget about trying to have a life and seriously be dedicated to school. Unfortunately, this doesn't seem to be possible for me. Dedication to school just isn't something that I can make myself do. It's the lame pre-requisite and general classes that kill me. Why can't I just be in my major? I say that now, but I don't think school is going to get any easier once I get in the program. In fact, life is just going to get busier. That's for sure one thing that I've learned. Life isn't going to get better once I finish this semester, or it's not going to get easier once I graduate. Life is always going to have challenges. That's why I'm here. I'm in a test. In fact, I'm close to the end of my test, I just need to hold out for the last few problems. I've made it this far, why give up now?
I don't know why, probably because it's almost Halloween and the Holidays but I have this odd obsession with candy. I've never been a huge candy fan; much rather have baked goods. But lately, I've been like overly obsessed with eating candy. All candy, I don't care what kind. My roommate posted an article on my other roommate's facebook about candy. It talked about how candy has a bad reputation for having lots of sugar when really, cookies and juice have just as much sugar as candy. Candy just gets a bad rep. One statistic that surprised me was that only 6% of sugar consumption comes from candy where about 46% of it comes from juice. See? candy isn't that bad. It's probably because we all grow up learning that candy is bad and so we're all brainwashed and grow up drinking lots of juice when really, they're both loaded with sugar. So, let's use that excuse and just eat candy.
I've decided that I live in a bubble. I don't know anything about the world around me. I watched part of the news this morning but I didn't have time to watch anything more than the weather. But I'm going to try harder. I feel so out of it when things are going on in the world and I don't find out about them until weeks later. How am I supposed to help the cause if I don't even know the issues that I can help with. I want to become aware and then help others to become aware so that together we can do something about it.
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